Knocked Up

When I lived overseas, I could be found every Saturday morning in the same seat at the same outdoor cafe. After a few months a young waitress asked me if I had OCD or was retarded or something because I was always in the same seat, always with the same dumb-looking expression on my face. I said that while the jury is still out on all those things that this table was the most entertaining spot in the whole universe. She looked at me with that “so you are retarded” look. I quickly tried to explain why I sat there. I told her to look across the street and tell me what she saw. She looked at me puzzled and said, “A adult book store.” “Okay, what is next to it?” I asked. She looked again and said, “A Christian book store.” When I go to the zoo, I don’t go to look at the flea-infested stressed out creatures behind the bars; I go to look at the people looking at the animals. I sat in that same place every Saturday because nothing is more entertaining than watching people go in and out of those two book stores. (Although for the life of me I have never seen anyone actually buy a book from an 18+ establishment.) The employees of both places have the same drawn look, just another day in the coal mine. But what is really neat is to watch the customers go in and out and, if truth be told, they are often the same people. What makes this observing fun is walks change. Some people try to act cool. Others look left and right and then dash in. Some make a big production number of it. They want everyone and their friend to know that they are about to enter one of the two businesses. There are those who are sheepish. Those who look like the world has kicked them in the teeth and inside one of those buildings might be the peace of mind they need to get through the day. Those who pull up the collar and pull down the hat because they don’t want anyone to know. If you are really lucky, you get the special moment when someone comes out of one of the shops with a Bible or with a device that has been banned in the state of Georgia and they bump into someone they know. Eyes lower. Faces turn red. Assurances are given. “I just bought this for a friend.” “No, I am not a Jesus freak.” “It’s a gag gift for someone at work.” “Please, please don’t tell.” Rain or shine, good weather or bad, business is always booming. Sitting there in my seat I often felt like I was Nero watching the lion eat a plate of ribs at the coliseum. Most of life can be summed up between those two establishments. How you handle yourself in that walk between the spirit and the flesh says everything about who you are, because as hard as you try, you cannot spend 24/7 in either place; eventually you have got to leave and do a little widow shopping. No matter what, the traffic is always constant.

Ninety to ninety-five of adults have engaged in pre-marital sex according to the latest survey, but it is okay, because according to your pastor, only those who dance under the disco ball are going to burn in Hades. Before you believe that those five percent are surrounding you in church, remember, somewhere in America there is a huge Star Trek convention going on and most of the people there have long ago learned to cook for one. Before you start rubbing your hands together and talking about how this is proof of America’s morals going downhill, over 80 percent of the “greatest generation” were not pure as the driven snow on their wedding night, and it was more common for people to get married as teenagers then! It says people are pretty much the same today as they were half a century ago. In other words, your sweet white-haired grandmother was probably a “party girl” (except my grandmothers who are still virginal to this day). We don’t handle sex well in this society. When it comes to our kids, we seem to either become the father who looks up from his newspaper when his daughter brings the grandkids over and thinks to himself that he can probably delay “the talk” for a couple more years or we become the hip mom who has that slightly dazed look from one too many Prozacs as she is renting the hotel room, complete with that special gift basket, for junior at prom. Mostly we are uncomfortable and embarrassed.

Director Judd Apatow seems to be making a career of finding humor in that uncomfortable area. Apatow, who made his bones on two of the most underrated series in the history of television, Freaks & Geeks and Undeclared, hit it big two years ago with the sex comedy The 40 Year Old Virgin which told the story of Andy, a middle aged man who had spent most of his life waiting for, well, you know. It was hilarious to everyone but my minister brother who let me know there was nothing funny in it. Apatow’s newest movie is called Knocked Up. You don’t have to be Sherlock Holmes to figure out what this movie is going to be about. It is not subtle, no beating around the bush on this one. Apatow hands the ball to one of his usual suspects, character actor Seth Rogen (Freaks & Geeks, Undeclared, Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy). Most people will remember him as Cal, the big guy who was one of Andy’s co-workers, from The 40 Years Old Virgin. Every ugly man in America is applauding this decision. Apatow’s films usually center on nerds and lovable losers, and Rogen, as Ben Stone, is another in a long line of these characters. Apatow realizes what Hollywood struggles to understand. When it comes to comedy, the best ones have characters that you can identify with. The film opens with Ben thinking he has just had the luckiest night of his life. He has just drunkenly scored with E! Entertainment hostess, Alison Scott (Katherine Heigl – “Grey’s Anatomy”, The Ringer). While nearly broke, portly men scoring with hot chicks only occurs in bad sitcoms, geezer rock tours, and films like this, you realize that it is just a movie. Alison turns up pregnant after their one-night stand. Now, if more of us were good with our math, we would realize this happens more often than we like to admit. Several weeks later, knock, knock, knock, I’m pregnant. Both want to do right for the child, but will these two strangers get along and more importantly fall in love? Will Ben and his friends get their celeb porn web site off the ground in time for him to support a baby or will he have to turn to other fields? Will Ben be able to grow up enough to handle a child in his life especially when his biggest role model is his 3-time divorced father (Harold Ramis)?

I have tried to give away as little of the plot as possible because comedies work best when you don’t know what is coming. Between trailers and other critics, too many of the belly laughs will be revealed before you ever walk into the theater. This is a home run. It is easily one of the funniest films of 2007. It is on par with The 40 Year Old Virgin. My only question, is this a movie you want to take a date to? It could leave you standing between those 2 stores.

Verdict: Home Run, One of the Funniest Films of 2007